Converging Layers of Shame

A furball of

 

shame

spewed from deep inside

my being

onto the bathtub floor.

**

It didn’t come fast or easy.

It was concealed

in thick, viscous muck,

taking it’s time

like a demon talking it’s prey.

**

Once spotted

she let out a

freight-train roar

and demanded devotion

unmercifully

**

I was dirty,

through and

through, as if

there was no end

to my badness

**

Desperate for the water

to save me,

it didn’t.

Heat rained down

upon my existence.

**

A life review revealed

an intended design

not to my liking.

Disgust and darkness

pirouetted into innocence.

**

Mother, forlorn

as she was,

forgiven

for her lack of joy

which became

my shadow.

**

Infant, mother, me, we,

twitching, turning

creations

of time and space

released and renewed in a flash.

**

The grip of stagnation

falls away as

converging layers are met with

the unyielding light of

compassion and kindness.